Delusional

I titled this post delusional as it is my current frame of mind these days. ... Let me explain. 

Most of you are here because you received a copy/pasted text or email that's directed you here. Most of you are family or friends , clients or customers I've "collected" over the years. I love each and every one of you, but most of you are grossly missing that part we all miss when we end up saying the phrase, "I didn't even know they were sick".

I just got out of the hospital again... and you know my story telling ass totally wants to tell you how the hospital effed up and almost killed me. Not even exaggerating. I'll save it for the few that want to know and share it on TikTok. 

Now...don't get your panties in a bunch. I'm not upset at anyone. In fact, this text is being written with my usual sly smile. I'm razzing you, but still being serious. I'm merely delusionally going to ask for help. The very thing I'm not good at doing.

I suppose I've sent the text and emails to everyone I've connected with over the last 9 or so years. I know life has changed. Maybe we don't talk because I was annoying, or too hyper, or maybe you experienced my toxic traits. If that's the case, don't bother me back. I'm sorry I bothered you to get to this point. 

Everyone else, I'm not well. My health was in straight decline up until this last hospital stay, and even now, I'm slowly gaining my bearings. Today I weighed 112 which is amazing, considering a month ago I was 106 and could barely move or function. My vascular malformations have been deemed inoperable by the Mayo Vascular Clinic in Rochester, MD. and that's been a huge blow... don't worry, I may be seriously depressed but I haven't given up. Henry is only 7... I can't give up. I am slowly researching possible next steps but also being realistic with a 'bucket list'.

I don't know how to ask for help. I've never asked for help. And if you know me, you know I'm an equal energy sort of believer. I legit published the poetry art book to raise money as opposed to asking for help. I've been sitting on that book for over a year, waiting to see if I had it in me to write more. I published it myself and I'm the only one you can buy it from. I don't want Amazon and the big book houses to get a cut.

Yeah...I have a new poetry art book out. Yes I have a go fund me. Yes I have art for sale. Yes, I'm on TikTok chatting during coffee time for subscribers to interact. Life has been hard on my little family unit since I got sick. It was humbling to realize the magnitude of my gravity on everyone, especially when home health started coming to the house.

So... my call to help. Please check out my linktree. If you don't Feel called to help, I appreciate your time in reading the entire blog. Engagement time is huge in the social media world of algorithmic push. Sharing this blog with anyone and everyone is also a big help. Word of mouth is super powerful.

That's really all there is. Most of you have my contact information if you want to chat. Some of you I chat with on TikTok too and let me say a BIG THANK YOU for not giving my goofy ass away and letting me make the people laugh.

I have 12 books left, by the way, so if I manage to sell out, just know, I'll have to order more. Not that I think that will happen, but still, FYI, holiday shipping is upon us.

I do hope you have a wonderful holiday season. Especially if I don't end up talking to you. Be well. Be blessed. And thanks again 🌞

~April